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Parents Awareness from the LPS Councellor

posted Nov 26, 2013, 11:50 AM by Nusrat Vorajee

What is bullying?

Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior among school-aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. The behavior is repeated, or has the potential to be repeated, over time. Both kids who are bullied and who bully others may have serious, lasting problems.

In order to be considered bullying, the behavior must be aggressive and include:

  • An Imbalance of Power: Kids who bully use their power—such as physical strength, access to embarrassing information, or popularity—to control or harm others. Power imbalances can change over time and in different situations, even if they involve the same people.
  • Repetition: Bullying behaviors happen more than once or have the potential to happen more than once.

Bullying includes actions such as making threats, spreading rumors, attacking someone physically or verbally, and excluding someone from a group on purpose.

What are the different types of bullying?

There are three types of bullying:

1. Verbal bullying is saying or writing mean things. Verbal bullying includes:
  • Teasing
  • Name-calling
  • Inappropriate comments
  • Taunting
  • Threatening to cause harm
2. Social bullying, sometimes referred to as relational bullying, involves hurting someone’s reputation or relationships. Social bullying includes:
  • Leaving someone out on purpose 
  • Telling other children not to be friends with someone 
  • Spreading rumors about someone 
  • Embarrassing someone in public
3. Physical bullying involves hurting a person’s body or possessions. Physical bullying includes:
  • Hitting/kicking/pinching 
  • Spitting 
  • Tripping/pushing 
  • Taking or breaking someone’s things 
  • Making mean or rude hand gestures

What can you do to prevent bullying?

Treat everyone with respect. Nobody should be mean to others.

  • Stop and think before you say or do something that could hurt someone. 
  • Keep in mind that everyone is different. Not better or worse. Just different. 
  • If you think you have bullied someone in the past, apologize.

What does the Prophet (PBUH) say about bullying?

The Prophet (PBUH) said, “A Muslim is the brother of every other Muslim; he does not wrong him, he does not fail him and he does not demean him… It is enough evil for anyone that he demeans his Muslim brother…The whole of a Muslim is forbidden to another Muslim: his blood, his property and his honor.” Narrated by Abu-Hurayra and reported by Muslim.

What does the Quran say about bullying?

O you who have believed, let not a people ridicule [another] people; perhaps they may be better than them; nor let women ridicule [other] women; perhaps they may be better than them. And do not insult one another and do not call each other by [offensive] nicknames. Wretched is the name of disobedience after [one's] faith. And whoever does not repent - then it is those who are the wrongdoers.” [49:11]

What if you are being bullied?

  • Look at the kid bullying you and tell him or her to stop in a calm, clear voice. You can also try to laugh it off. This works best if joking is easy for you. It could catch the kid bullying you off guard. 
  • If speaking up seems too hard or not safe, walk away and stay away. Don’t fight back. Find an adult to stop the bullying on the spot. 

There are things you can do to stay safe in the future, too:
  • Talk to an adult you trust. Don’t keep your feelings inside. Telling someone can help you feel less alone. 
  • Make an appointment with your school counselor to help you make a plan to stop the bullying.

Ms. Noor Elkhaldi

n.elkhaldi@leaderspreparatoryschool.org

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